Start With Self-Care
When you hear the words "self-care," what comes up for you? Self-care encompasses activities and practices that improve or maintain your health and wellbeing, allowing you to be the best version of yourself in midlife and beyond. In my journey of coaching successful professionals, teaching undergraduates about health, and my personal health journey of 50 plus years, I’ve found that self-care falls into three main categories: mindset, prioritizing, and taking meaningful action.
The Three Buckets of Self-Care
1. Mindset for Self-Care
How you think about caring for yourself significantly impacts how you practice self-care. As part of the Gen X generation, or the "just suck it up generation," we’ve been taught to work hard, not complain, and be resourceful. While this grit and resilience are beneficial, they can sometimes hinder our self-care efforts.
Common Self-Care Misconceptions
One misconception is that self-care is only about treating or pampering yourself. While massages or favorite desserts are important, self-care goes deeper. Another misconception is that self-care is selfish. On the contrary, ensuring your wellbeing allows you to be more present and supportive to others. Lastly, self-care is not just a to-do list; it’s about your mindset and behaviors that align with your personal needs and situation.
2. Prioritizing Self-Care
Managing time and conflicting responsibilities is crucial for self-care. Many of us in the sandwich generation juggle responsibilities such as caring for children, supporting aging parents, meeting professional deadlines, and maintaining personal relationships. Balancing these roles requires setting aside time for self-care, despite feelings of guilt or shame that might arise from conflicting values.
Balancing Responsibilities and Self-Care
To manage this, it’s essential to recognize and address conflicting values. For instance, valuing your health and helping others might sometimes clash. Being aware of these conflicts can help you create a balanced approach to self-care.
3. Taking Meaningful Action
Creating self-care routines that align with your values and offer significant impact is key. Self-care doesn’t have to be time-consuming or overly planned. Even small, consistent actions can make a big difference.
Concrete Strategies for Self-Care
Experiment with New Practices: Be willing to try new things and learn from the experiences. Cultivate curiosity and a sense of adventure.
Do What Makes Your Heart Sing: Engage in activities that make you happy and rejuvenate you. Whether it’s dancing, reading, or socializing, find what renews your spirit and incorporate it into your routine.
Aim for Progress, Not Perfection: Self-care is a practice, not a one-time event. Allow yourself to be a work in progress and focus on what you can achieve rather than striving for perfection.
Set Weekly and Monthly Goals: Identify self-care actions you can take in the next week and month. What can you commit to that will improve your overall self-care?
Seek Support: Determine what support you need to make your self-care plans a reality. Whether it’s family, friends, or professional help, ensure you have the resources to succeed.
Conclusion
Reflect on what you’re already doing well in terms of self-care. Celebrate these successes and identify areas for improvement. By considering your mindset, prioritizing your responsibilities, and taking meaningful action, you can enhance your self-care practices and overall wellbeing.